Smart Tips for Working with Difficult People
By Carol Gee
Every organization has them: those employees that make work life difficult for us. Maybe you currently work with a few of them. Maybe you’ve worked with a few of them in the past. Perhaps you (gasp) even work for one of them.
Wouldn’t it be fabulous if everyone you worked with or managed got along well day in and day out? I’m talking no theatrics, bickering, or complaining. I’m talking simply nonstop productivity from the start of the work day to close of business. Okay, I admit I frequently exist in a dream world. What writer doesn’t?
Many of us recognize these individuals below:
The Know-It-All. This individual has an opinion on everything. They can be male or female. When they are wrong, they tend to get defensive.
The “Yes” Person. Again, gender does not matter. These individuals agree to anything, to any commitment. However, while they agree with the consensus, they frequently fail to follow through on commitments.
The Dictator. In truth, these individuals are bullies. They try to intimidate. They are often demanding and can be quite critical.
The “No” Person. These individuals are quick to point out why something will not work. They also tend to be inflexible.
The Griper. This person may also go by the name, complainer. Is anything ever right for these folks? Frustratingly, these individuals prefer complaining to trying to find solutions to whatever is the problem.
The Blamer. They blame others for everything. Nothing is ever this person’s fault. Blamers always see others as responsible for their difficulties. Blaming others for their poor choices or decisions is one way for these individuals to avoid taking responsibility for their lives.
While the following may not actually have a name, they too can make us crazy. These include:
People who always take everything personally. These folks can remain in ‘hurt’ mode for days.
Those individuals who like to practice one-upmanship. With these individuals everything turns into a competition. For instance, you share your latest travel horror story. (Who among us hasn’t had one)? Without fail, this individual will have a bigger, more horrible version of their own trip.
Why do these folks act the way they do? The truth is, there may be many reasons. Learning why they act the way they do and then how to work with or alongside these individuals, other employees will be less of a target for these folks’ dramas.
One way to do this might be to try to find some common ground with the difficult individual. Better yet, why not take them aside and try to find out what is causing the behavior? Often work colleagues are dealing with a problem in their private lives of which colleagues may be unaware. A loved one’s illness or other stressors can affect a person’s entire demeanor.
Another way might be acknowledging the contributions of those who helped you to accomplish a task or made a project a success. Doing this, coworkers will value you as a colleague. You’ll have accomplished your own work goals, and perhaps even helped them during the process. An added bonus– your supervisor or other management will see you as a team player.
Managers who have or have had to deal with the above or other employee antics also have their work cut out for them. The big question: how do you motivate a change in these folks? One way may be through helping these employees to identify their particular strengths. After all, everyone has a particular strength or a specific talent or skill. Building upon an employee’s strengths in a manner that will enhance productivity within the company is a smart investment to make.
Complimenting, recognizing, and praising their specific contributions may go a long way in motivating a change within these negative Nellies. Helping employees harness their best abilities also benefits the organization immensely, and you don’t have to be a manager to do this. However, this recognition and understanding will also help those in charge to improve their leadership skills.
Sadly, dealing with difficult colleagues will always be a factor throughout our working lives. How skillfully we deal with them will reflect both upon our professionalism and career success.
About the Author: Carol Gee, M.A. has worked in education for 28 years in positions ranging from teaching to administration. Currently she is an editor and business writer at Goizueta Business School at Emory University. She is also the author of books, The Venus Chronicles and Diary of a ‘Flygirl’ Wannabe (Life Lessons of a Cool Girl in Training)
www.venuschronicles.net
Every organization has them: those employees that make work life difficult for us. Maybe you currently work with a few of them. Maybe you’ve worked with a few of them in the past. Perhaps you (gasp) even work for one of them.
Wouldn’t it be fabulous if everyone you worked with or managed got along well day in and day out? I’m talking no theatrics, bickering, or complaining. I’m talking simply nonstop productivity from the start of the work day to close of business. Okay, I admit I frequently exist in a dream world. What writer doesn’t?
Many of us recognize these individuals below:
While the following may not actually have a name, they too can make us crazy. These include:
Why do these folks act the way they do? The truth is, there may be many reasons. Learning why they act the way they do and then how to work with or alongside these individuals, other employees will be less of a target for these folks’ dramas.
One way to do this might be to try to find some common ground with the difficult individual. Better yet, why not take them aside and try to find out what is causing the behavior? Often work colleagues are dealing with a problem in their private lives of which colleagues may be unaware. A loved one’s illness or other stressors can affect a person’s entire demeanor.
Another way might be acknowledging the contributions of those who helped you to accomplish a task or made a project a success. Doing this, coworkers will value you as a colleague. You’ll have accomplished your own work goals, and perhaps even helped them during the process. An added bonus– your supervisor or other management will see you as a team player.
Managers who have or have had to deal with the above or other employee antics also have their work cut out for them. The big question: how do you motivate a change in these folks? One way may be through helping these employees to identify their particular strengths. After all, everyone has a particular strength or a specific talent or skill. Building upon an employee’s strengths in a manner that will enhance productivity within the company is a smart investment to make.
Complimenting, recognizing, and praising their specific contributions may go a long way in motivating a change within these negative Nellies. Helping employees harness their best abilities also benefits the organization immensely, and you don’t have to be a manager to do this. However, this recognition and understanding will also help those in charge to improve their leadership skills.
Sadly, dealing with difficult colleagues will always be a factor throughout our working lives. How skillfully we deal with them will reflect both upon our professionalism and career success.
About the Author: Carol Gee, M.A. has worked in education for 28 years in positions ranging from teaching to administration. Currently she is an editor and business writer at Goizueta Business School at Emory University. She is also the author of books, The Venus Chronicles and Diary of a ‘Flygirl’ Wannabe (Life Lessons of a Cool Girl in Training)
www.venuschronicles.net
